List of Coping Skills for Love and Sex Addiction
When you are new to recovery , having skills to replace acting out behaviors, fantasy thoughts, and urges to act out is absolutely vital. Here is a list of strategies you can use on your path to recovery and sobriety.
Physical Activities (to release energy and stress)
Go for a walk or run in nature.
Do a high-intensity workout (HIIT, strength training, etc.).
Try yoga or stretching exercises.
Dance to your favorite music.
Take a cold or hot shower.
Go for a swim.
Practice deep breathing exercises.
Do a physical hobby like gardening, woodworking, or painting.
Try a new sport or recreational activity.
Clean or organize a space in your home.
Mental Distraction Activities (to redirect your focus)
Read a book (fiction, self-help, biography, etc.).
Listen to a podcast or audiobook.
Work on a challenging puzzle or brain game.
Write in a journal about your feelings and thoughts.
Watch a documentary or educational content.
Learn a new skill (coding, language, musical instrument, etc.).
Create a personal development plan or set short-term goals.
Try creative writing (stories, poetry, letters to future self, etc.).
Research a topic you're interested in.
Play a strategy board game or online game.
Emotional Regulation Activities (to manage stress and urges)
Call or text a supportive friend or accountability partner.
Attend a support group (in-person or virtual).
Practice grounding techniques (5-4-3-2-1 method).
Write out positive affirmations and read them aloud.
Use a guided meditation app like Headspace or Calm.
Practice gratitude journaling.
Write a letter to your future self.
Talk to a therapist or counselor.
Identify your triggers and develop a plan to address them.
Engage in a random act of kindness for someone else.
Creative Outlets (to channel energy productively)
Paint, draw, or sketch something.
Try adult coloring books or digital art apps.
Learn photography or practice photo editing.
Make music or experiment with sound creation.
Cook or bake something new.
Start a DIY project or craft.
Build something with Legos, puzzles, or models.
Write a short story, poem, or personal blog.
Make a vision board for your future goals.
Rearrange your living space to feel fresh.
Spiritual or Mindfulness Activities (to reconnect with yourself)
Spend time in nature (park, beach, forest, etc.).
Pray or engage in spiritual reflection.
Read scripture or a spiritual text.
Practice mindfulness meditation.
Attend a church, support group, or spiritual gathering.
Write out what you’re grateful for each day.
Watch a sunrise or sunset.
Fast from social media for a day or longer.
Do a digital detox and minimize screen time.
Journal about your spiritual growth or journey.
Social Connection (to reduce isolation)
Call or video chat with a friend or family member.
Join a new hobby group or club.
Volunteer in your community.
Go out for coffee or a meal with someone you trust.
Attend a meetup or community event.
Plan a game night with friends.
Write a handwritten letter to someone.
Offer to help someone in need.
Engage in social activities without pressure (concert, festival, etc.).
Build or strengthen your support network.
Emergency Distraction Methods (when urges feel overwhelming)
Take a 5-minute cold shower.
Go for a fast-paced walk or run.
Hold ice in your hands to ground yourself.
Splash cold water on your face.
Call a trusted friend and talk about anything unrelated to the urge.
Do 100 jumping jacks or push-ups to release tension.
Turn on loud music and sing/dance.
Write down exactly how you’re feeling in the moment.
Count backward from 100 in multiples of 3.
Step outside and get fresh air for at least 10 minutes.
Preventative Self-Care (to build long-term strength)
Plan your days to stay productive and avoid idle time.
Build a consistent morning and evening routine.
Get 7-9 hours of quality sleep.
Eat nourishing, healthy foods regularly.
Drink plenty of water throughout the day.
Limit screen time, especially late at night.
Spend less time on social media or eliminate triggering content.
Track your progress and celebrate small victories.
Develop new, healthy hobbies.
Seek out a mentor, coach, or accountability partner.
Reward-Based Activities (to create positive reinforcement)
Treat yourself to something special after a trigger-free day.
Plan a future trip or getaway.
Buy a new book, game, or hobby item as a reward.
Create a personal reward chart for progress.
Set up small milestone rewards (weekly, monthly, quarterly).
Write yourself a congratulatory note after reaching a goal.
Plan a "self-care day" when you’ve made consistent progress.
Reflect on how far you’ve come each month.
Create a visual progress tracker (chart, calendar, etc.).
Celebrate with friends when you reach a major goal.
Personal Development (to build resilience)
Take an online course or class.
Start a new long-term project.
Set and work toward fitness goals.
Read personal development books.
Join a support group for accountability.
Build a daily journaling habit.
Commit to 30 days of a new habit or discipline.
Listen to recovery or self-help podcasts.
Develop a personal mission statement.
Work on rebuilding trust and relationships affected by acting out.
Pro Tip:
Keep a physical or digital list of your top 10 go-to activities when you feel an urge coming on.
Pair physical activity (like a walk or workout) with mental distraction (like listening to a podcast) for double effectiveness.
If the urge is overwhelming, immediately change your environment (leave the room, go outside, call a friend, etc.).
Are you someone suffering from love or sex addiction in MN? I’m here to help.
